Merry Christmas.. or so it says. rain rain rain, in every aspect. i think i am an extremely hard person to please. I might laugh on the outside but actually am crashing within. Can't wait for 2009 to be over.. not that i know 2010 will be like 100000 times better but 2009 is just.. like that.

Family gathering strangely feel okay even with the out of tune carols and super off beat singing.. i did drift in and out with my thoughts and all, feel stuffed with food but devoid of sentiment. I dare say that i'm actually quite ruthless in the way i deal with things in my life.. or even towards the people i love and care for. i really don't think anyone will understand what i'm saying.. or me for that matter, but who's complaining? Life still has to go on somehow.. i'll find a path, any path, the right path.

Merry Box-mas.

i'm quite exhausted i must say.. working onsite in the morning and then backroom in the afternoon is quite draining.. but well, at least it brings in extra cash.. Praise God. :) made another new friend today too, so i guess that's good. if only i can make friends that easily in school as well, then that'll be awesome!

:) but in all things, give thanks! thank God that i can still go school at least, can study something that i have no prior knowledge, able to talk and to walk and to earn money. to have a family and a roof over my head, to have friends to hang out and talk to, a church where i'm comfortably settled and willing to run for, a God who is above all and has the best plans for me. :)

in all things, give thanks. thankfulness is like medicine that will cure the depression, physical sickness, warped mind and will attract people all around. :)

i'm in a midst of change, realised my current skill set is insufficient and is only good 2 years back.. time to improve once again and be on the cutting edge.

Not by might nor by strength but by my Spirit says the Lord. :)

Its very interesting (to me at least), that David went to face Goliath. we all know how he defeated but David did not back down or wait for Goliath to come, he wasn't passive, he was pro active in tackling Goliath (aka giants in our lives) face on.

Get up on your feet!

New week, new challenges.

New level, new devil.

and re-Newed faith and hope.

Time to face the giants in my life.

my dream is to be a pro soccer play. HAHA. :) if i get the opportunity, i'll def go for it! if la...

work was just horrid to say the least.. up to now, i never really say what i actually felt, it was more of the telling of events chronologically as well as logically to sum it all up, but maybe the musings within were never unleashed, but just stored within. i'm only just a temp staff, trying my best to do everything right..why do i have to put up with all this "feels" in the office? you can do a million good things but everything evaporates with 1 bad sunshine (oxymoron). looking at the schedule next week too, it seems pretty obvious that trust is misplaced, or maybe i'm just abit sensitive.

but so what if i'm a temp staff? whatever i do, it is not for man (or the little pay, or for the people), it is for God. and when its for God, it should be done excellently. and i will carry on to do so.. until the day i'm no longer there. because this is being faithful in the small little things.

and i realised that a day is never truly over until the body goes to sleep.. because life is a box of treats! the treats that you take out from the box can either be good or bad (yet they are still treats..)

oh well. goodnight world!

well, first things first! Thank you Jesus! :) the sermon on sat was a really a blast! and i know for sure it is def not my own effort but God really orchestrating every single thing that went on for the service. :) we can plant the seeds but "God gives the increase" and it is sooo true. We can do everything humanly possible but it is still up to God to "give the increase". and how He sent Roland to guide me along as well in the preparation in the afternoon before service. haha alot of nervous moments before service started.. even up to the point where i went up, i was still soooo nervous. but praise God, once i got up, it was really Him all the way.. :) and the video clip inspired by the Holy Spirit to be shared was just soooo amazing. i cried while watching the clip at home, it just so inspiring.. and someone told me she even cried during the clip also. haha. :) facing the giants rock. and it was soooo awesome to have so much support from people around actually. Michelle, James, Dawn, Joel, Gabs, Kenneth, Alex, Jayne, Chellie, Roland,Megan my cell! :) and whoever else that i missed out..and even more awesome that after that,to hear how people's lives are being impacted, they have renewed dreams. :)

but yay! :) being steadfast... having a vision, must pursue, being faithful and staying tenacious are some of the qualities we must apply in our lives. and being the preacher, i myself even more gotta apply it into my life.. :) hard leh! but can one la..

so today i woke up late for school..

HAHA. so much for being steadfast.. but thank God there was another same module lecture in the afternoon and i managed to go for that and catch up.. after that was Human Resource Management.. haha. that is quite a dry topic. but its nice to eat fruits in the lecture... and right in front of the lecturer as well. haha. that made my day slightly better...

So many couples sitting or walking around in SIM. a huge sighs sometimes. this feeling of.. wanting someone is like "dogs nibbling at my heels". and plus yesterday James showed me a love story clip.. a huger sigh! hahah. i hope i'll have an extraordinary love story with my wife next time to be shared. or well, it'll be nice to meet her right now! ok la not at home, but soon i hope.. someone i can really really share my life with, every single moment, every single part of it. :)

but till then, i have a responsibility to ensure that my cell will grow further into a zone, setting the right culture in place, teaching the word of God and grounding people in His love. although sometimes i really dislike the administrative decisions and coordination that i have to do nowadays, but its all for God, i'm not just going to do it but going to do it excellently.